#16

 

Geography – GCSE level.

The concept of a spherical earth dates back as least as far as the 6th century BCE, and is commonly attributed to Pythagoras. Ptolemy’s world map of 150CE, despite a mistaken measure of the earth’s circumference, is clearly based on a sphere with lines of longitude and latitude to record its coordinates, and contrary to popular belief, even in the dark ages hardly anyone thought that the earth was flat.

However, maps are often more useful than globes – they fold for convenient transport, they can be laid out flat for simple perusal, and they can be easily made at a vast range of different scales. Take a large scale globe with you on your travels and instead of a conquistador, the natives might think you were a pilates instructor.

But the problem of map projection – portraying a sphere’s surface on a plane – has existed for as long as the knowledge that one can’t sail off the edge of the world, and in the early 19th Century, Gauss’s Theorema Egregium proved once and for all that a sphere’s surface couldn’t be represented on a plane without distortion. Which brings us to this attempt to fit an oblate spheroid peg into a two-dimensional hole...

The teacher has made a good choice of map projection by avoiding the infamously distorting Mercator projection, which was deprecated with all other cylindrical projections in a 1989 resolution by seven North American geographical groups. The Mercator projection maps the sphere on to a rectangle, and the teacher here is clearly using a pseudocylindrical projection, using only the central meridian as a straight line. From the shape of the oval that she has drawn around her continents it looks like she is using a Mollweide or Tobler hyperelliptical projection – a good compromise between not distorting shapes and preserving area measure.

The Mercator projection, albeit useful for mariners with its ability to represent lines of constant course as straight segments that conserve the angles with the meridians, infamously makes Greenland larger than Australia. At least the teacher has avoided that error, albeit by not putting either Greenland or Australia on her map. Any map larger in scale than 1:1 must omit some detail, and the best maps are masterpieces of simplicity and clarity (consider Harry Beck's iconic London Underground diagram to realise that what is left out is as important as what is put in), but leaving out entire continents really cannot be excused. Although this photograph is undated, Australia was definitely discovered before the whiteboard was invented. Or indeed photography.

The Mercator projection is also criticised for being Euro-centric, for example showing Finland as extending further from north to south than the vast Indian subcontinent. Again, the teacher has avoided that politically incorrect error, but by not putting either Finland or India on her map. In fact, it would be easier to list what is on her map: the Americas (although Ferdinand de Lesseps would have a hard time building the Panama Canal across this Central American isthmus that is barely narrower than Brazil), Africa, and a blob that by a process of elimination must represent all the intricate islands and peninsulas of Europe. Russia extends east into Asia, but the age of discovery ends here, without so much as a “Here be kangaroos”.

Even with a globe in front of her to copy from Ptolemy’s map looks better than this, and he didn’t have the advantage of having a whiteboard to rub out any mistakes.

3/10 A good start, but over-simplified and incomplete to the point of being useless.

#15

 

ENGLISH 101

GRAMMER

ADVERBS

VERBS

NOUNS

TEST
FRI

PUNCTUATION

SENTENCE
STRUCTURES

PROF GUNN

OFFICE HOURS

RM 343

BLDG 7
W 2-3

TH 1-3

English – primary school level.

It is a truth universally acknowledged that any criticism of another’s spelling will itself contain a spelling mistake. One is not just putting one’s head above the parapet, but doing so whilst wearing an oversized, illuminated ‘Shoot Me Quick’ hat. The phenomenon is indeed so well-known that it has become known as Muphry’s Law. Nevertheless, it must be pointed out that an English teacher, particularly of an introductory course such as this, should be able to spell the word ‘grammar’. There are no excuses, not even one about Kelsey Grammer.

George Bernard Shaw, Mark Twain et al might have had a point about reforming English spelling, but German-style changes are unlikely to happen here and we will all just have to learn to work with our historically idiosyncratic system, including English teachers. In fact, especially English teachers.

Dyslexia is of course a serious issue, but if your spelling is this poor you probably shouldn’t become an English teacher, in the same way that if you are colour-blind you shouldn’t become a train driver, if you can’t swim you shouldn’t become a lifeguard and if you have a peanut allergy you shouldn’t get a job taste-testing Snickers bars.

In fact, there probably hasn’t been a spelling mistake this embarrassing since a spelling game DVD hosted by Eamonn Holmes spelled his name on the front cover as Eamon, leading to the first 10,000 units being scrapped. Thankfully, Eamonn's career was unaffected and he can still be seen regularly on ITV.

Nowadays, the use of spell-checkers is widespread, but even these won’t catch every error and students should learn that a CV containing a spelling mistake will often be consigned straight to the bin. It is worrying that Professor Gunn has made it this far in education and one can only be more concerned about the literacy levels of his superiors. Professor Gunn has no excuse for not brushing up on such basics as he only appears to work for three hours a week. Hopefully the test on Friday will involve actually using punctuation, and sentence structures that are more complex than
PUTTING
EVERY
WORD
IN
CAPITALS
ON
A
NEW
LINE.

3/10 Could do bettar.

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Bad Rainbows - Crock of gold? More like crock of shit. One man's crusade against incorrectly-drawn rainbows.

#14

(32F)U/2^N = L^U.4S(4/T)
4F(U/2ⁿ) = L^U3S(4/T)
F(U/2ⁿ) = L^US(4/T)
FU^N = L^UST 

Mathematics – GCSE level.

To begin with, the presentation is non-standard and quite sloppy. Firstly, numbers should go before letters, so for example the right hand side of the second line should read 3L^US(4/T). Secondly, all the parentheses are unnecessary as multiplication is associative – careful positioning of symbols next to fractions should obviate any confusion as to whether to multiply by the numerator or denominator. Thirdly, the 'N' on the left hand side changes to an 'n' and back again. Finally, it is more usual to use all lower case letters for unknowns. 

Algebra may mean ‘reunion of broken parts’, but there's no happy reconciliation for this equation. It is quite impossible to make FU^N=L^UST as there is an error in each step of the calculation. The basic rule of manipulating equations in this way is that whatever is done to one side of the equation must also be done to the other side.  This rule has not been followed: 

– At the second step, the left hand side has been divided by 8, but the right hand side by 4/3. 

– At the third step, the left hand side has been divided by 4, but the right hand side by 3. 

– At the final step, the left hand side has been multiplied by 2^NU^N-1, but the right hand side by T²/4.

Taking the first line as the starting point, the closest to FU^N equalling L^UST that can actually be achieved is FU/2^N-1 = L^US/T.

The teacher could have instead started with 2nu/ts = (2/f)l^u, which can be rearranged to show that fun=l^ust. (Although nuts flu does sound rather like something that may be a result of too much fun lust.)

If the teacher is looking for a way to show how fun algebra can be by making words out of the symbols, she might instead try asking her students what the volume of a circular pizza of radius z and height a is.

2/10 A nice try in engaging students, but riddled with errors. 

(Answer: pi.z.z.a – now that is fun!)

#13

SEAT
BELT

REMEMBER..
NO, NO, NO,
U-turns over
double yellow lines

10 2
Keep Hands
on wheel
10-2

           C

LeFT   B
Signal
           A

Driver’s Education

It is a promising start that the first thing on this blackboard is SEAT BELT as putting one on is the first thing one should do when getting into a car. Seatbelts have been a major contribution to road safety – they reduce the risk of fatal or serious injury in a collision by as much as 50%. Risk compensation theory, where drivers who feel safer in one way instead take risks in other ways, does muddy the statistics somewhat, but there is no doubt that it is better to wear one. Volvo’s decision to make the patent for their three-point system open and let other car manufacturers copy it for free should be applauded. (Drug companies, please take note.)

Anecdotes about car users who died terrible deaths because they were trapped by their seatbelts, or who miraculously survived a collision specifically by not wearing one abound, but whilst it is true that seatbelts may cause serious injury or death (or their non-use save lives) in particular accidents, these incidents are much rarer than those in which the use of seatbelts saves lives. The occurrence of these rare incidents is also usually much overstated, like referring to a 100-year-old who smokes 20 a day, but not mentioning the thousands who die young of lung cancer.

Cries of civil liberties regarding the mandatory use of seat belts should also be ignored – not wearing a seatbelt is not a victimless crime when an unrestrained body becomes a lethal missile for other car occupants. Even for accidents involving just a single driver the cost to society of more serious injury or death cannot be discounted. Clunk click every trip.

As a side note, another safety issue to note before even getting into a car is that bare or stockinged feet are not recommended behind the wheel. They are also unacceptable in a classroom situation and the teacher should enforce this for both theory and practical driving lessons.

It is also good that the dangers of U-turns over double yellow lines (the road marking indicating the division between oncoming lanes in this jurisdiction) are being highlighted. The chalk marks around ‘U-turn’ indicate a thorough demonstration of what a U-turn is with several such manoeuvres clearly shown. This kind of diagram, combined with the repetition of the drawing action can particularly help visual learners who might be struggling with the concept of ‘U’. There might indeed be another such demonstration below the words ‘double yellow lines’ to give extra reinforcement to the point, unless those are meant to be double yellow lines, in which case they are a rather poor effort, being neither yellow nor entirely double.

Whilst at one time ‘10 and 2’ was indeed the preferred position for hands on a steering wheel (although this diagram actually shows something closer to 10:30 and 1:30), the advent of power steering means that the extra leverage gained by beginning a turn with a larger downward movement is no longer necessary. Indeed, the advent of airbags means that ‘10 and 2’ is actually dangerous, with the airbag explosion turning the driver’s hands and forearms into face-seeking projectiles. ‘8 and 4’ or ‘9 and 3’ is now the recommended configuration – it is clearly time to update curriculum materials and send this teacher on a refresher course. Indeed the entire concept of using an analogue clock as a reference is rather outdated – perhaps iPod controls would be more relevant to this cohort, so instead of ‘hands at 9 and 3’ they would be taught ‘hands at skip back and skip forward’.

In the overtaking manoeuvre diagram, the curved arrows showing the overtaking vehicle’s path show that it approaches dangerously close to car B before swerving sharply into the oncoming lane, possibly even clipping the rear bumper. Such manoeuvres should be planned further in advance, executed more smoothly and not bring vehicles into dangerous proximity with each other.

The left signal (or ‘LeFT Signal’) also comes far too late to give other road users warning of the driver’s intentions. Remember: mirror, signal, manoeuvre, not manoeuvre, signal, learn how to use lower case letters.

It is also worth noting that 32% of jurisdictions drive on the left (and rising – the last right-to-left switch was in 2009, whilst the most recent left-to-right change was over 30 years before that), so in those parts of the world this last diagram would show an undertaker rather than an overtaker – something that the learner driver might need if she follows those arrows.

5/10 Good work on buckling up, but the rest of the ideas need bucking up.

This Man Survived Crucifixion Using This One Weird Trick. Romans hate Him!

Find out more at our new site: TheBibleFeed

#12

⁴⁵Rh
102.906
Rhodium

⁹F
18.998
Fluorine

⁴Be
9.012
Beryllium

⁵⁷La
138.906
Lanthanum

C₂H₆O Example 1
  H H
  | |
H-C-C-O-H
  | |
  H H

Chemistry – A-level standard.

Education cutbacks are clearly hitting hard – this establishment can only afford a periodic table with four elements, and a hand-drawn one at that. Though not displayed in the correct order, all the information about the elements is correct, with the exception of lanthanum’s atomic weight. According to IUPAC, to three decimal places this should be 138.905 instead of 138.906 (actually 138.90547, so the rounding error is not great). Analysing the history of IUPAC’s regular redefinitions of elements’ atomic weight (as scientists become more accurate in their measurements) it can be deduced that not only is this teacher using a hand-drawn periodic table containing only four elements, but that it is at least seven years old (lanthanum's atomic weight was first published as its current value in 2005) and possibly dates back as far as 1969 (when 138.9055 replaced the previous figure of 138.91). Highlighting tiny discrepancies in atomic weight may seem like nitpicking, but it is this kind of fourth decimal place analysis that led to the discovery of deuterium.

What kind of chemistry can be taught using just these four elements is unclear - even the ancient Greeks thought there were at least five elements (according to Aristotle, air, fire, earth, water and aether - none of them actually elements). Fluorine will bond with pretty much anything, so that’s a good start, but not much useful can be made with them together. Lanthanum fluoride can be used as an ion-sensitive electrode, and beryllium fluoride is used in liquid-fluoride nuclear reactors, but you’d have a hard time making the rest of one with just rhodium and lanthanum. Indeed it is ironic that these impoverished students will be devoting a quarter of their time to studying rhodium, the most expensive element that it's actually possible to buy.

What is also ironic is that none of these elements are actually used in Example 1, which uses the much more common (though sadly unknown to this institution) elements of hydrogen, carbon and oxygen to make ethanol. It would be more useful to give the molecular formula of C₂H₅OH rather than the empirical one, to distinguish it from dimethyl ether, but the structure shown is correct. It’s just a shame that it will mean as much to these students as lanthanum would have done to Aristotle.

6/10 A good effort in trying economic times.

(Many thanks to Vytautas for sending this picture in.)

#11

CREATIONISM
YES!

DARWIN = CRACKPOT

DARWIN BELIEVES ->
FISH->MONKEY->GLEN->[WO]MAN
WRONG

MID-TERM
ASSIGNMENT
ESSAY –
RELIGION AND
CREATION OF THE WORLD
5000 WORDS
DUE FRIDAY

Biology – GCSE level.

The creation-evolution controversy, particularly its place in the classroom, is undoubtedly a hot topic du jour. Contemporary reaction to Darwin’s theory of evolution was in many ways less critical than that of today. A post-First World War surge of opposition to the idea of evolution, culminating in the Scopes monkey trial, has led to creationism (latterly in the guise of intelligent design) being taught for decades in US schools. The level of scientific support for evolution is overwhelming, but still the debate rages.

The idea that humans evolved from monkeys (or monkeys from fish) is a common misconception of Darwin’s theory, which actually proposes that humans and monkeys share a common ancestor that lived about 40 million years ago. It is also wrong to state that Darwin believed that humans evolved from monkeys via Glen (presumably the ‘missing link’ so beloved of creationists). A number of transitional fossils have been found to support the hominid evolutionary record, including Lucy (Australopithecus afarensi) and Ardi (Ardipithecus ramidus), but as yet there is no Glen. Such a discovery would surely only weaken the creationists’ standpoint.

The decision by the Kansas State Board of Education to allow the teaching of intelligent design as an alternative to evolution was challenged by concerned citizen Bobby Henderson, who called for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, his belief in a supernatural creator that closely resembles spaghetti and meatballs, to also be allotted equal time in science classrooms. The idea of a parody religion is not new – Bertrand Russell’s celestial teapot is the most famous argument that the philosophic burden of proof lies upon those who make unfalsifiable claims, not on those who reject them. Calls have also been made for physics teachers, alongside Newton’s law of universal gravitation, to teach intelligent falling. President Bush endorsed the teaching of intelligent design alongside evolution, stating, "I felt like both sides ought to be properly taught … so people can understand what the debate is about.” This is apt when he is perhaps the closest thing to a missing link yet found.

If creationism is to be taught in schools, then it should not be in the science classroom, but as a separate subject of politics of science and religion. And it should certainly be more balanced than simply calling Darwin a crackpot. Charles Darwin is one of the most influential figures in human history, and has the ultimate accolade of appearing on the back of an English banknote. What next: Elizabeth Fry = wally? Boulton and Watt = bozos? Adam Smith = nincompoop? (His name has been appropriated by the Adam Smith Institute, responsible for recommending the privatisation of British Rail and the introduction of the Poll Tax, so maybe the jury should stay out on that one.)

A ‘WO’ has been inserted in front of ‘MAN’, pointing out that the gender-neutral ‘human’ should perhaps have been used (despite the original use of ‘man’ as being a gender-neutral indefinite pronoun). Whilst this kind of direct linguistic rejection of a patriarchal hegemony might seem a little ‘bra-burning wimmin’ now, it provides a welcome relief to all the other conservative, reactionary nonsense.

A 5000 word essay by what is presumably this Friday is a tall order, but if God made the world in six days then it should be doable.

0/10 See me.

(Many thanks to Wayne for sending this picture in.)

#10

WORK HARD AND DO YOUR BEST

X| | 
 | |O
 |X|

Lessons in Life – universal
Computer Science – A-level/undergraduate level

There can be few better exhortations to students than this. Working hard and doing one’s best will always produce the finest possible results, either in the classroom or on the playing field. After any exam or sporting challenge there is no failure if one can say afterwards “I did my best”. (England footballers please take note.)

A game of noughts and crosses is underway on the blackboard. If this has been done by a student then it should have been rubbed off immediately (see post #9 re Wilson and Kelling’s broken windows theory). But if this is actually part of the lesson then a gold star should be awarded as noughts and crosses is a great introduction to many mathematical and computer science concepts from combinations and symmetry to artificial intelligence.

A first question to pose to the class would be how many games of noughts and crosses are possible (the game tree size)? A naive answer would be 9! = 362,880 (assuming X always goes first). However, many games will be over before all the squares are filled, and many more are simply rotations and reflections of others (in effect there are not nine, but only three starting places: corner, centre and edge). Taking these into account gives an answer of 26,830.

Devising an algorithm to produce perfect play is also a favourite challenge, exploring ideas such as backwards reasoning and recursion. These can then be applied to other, more complex games such as Connect 4 and draughts, through to unsolved games such as Reversi, chess and Go (with its game tree complexity of 10³⁶⁰).

However, if this is an attempt to teach the strategy of perfect play then one must hope that the teacher has picked a very poorly-played game to illustrate what not to do. Assuming that X’s first move was in the corner (always the best start: of the then 73 possible games, assuming perfect play on X’s part, 71 result in victory and two in a draw), then O has immediately blundered by playing the far edge instead of the centre (where his/her only hope of a draw can come from), resulting in what should be certain victory for X. X could then force a win by playing the centre, but has him/herself blundered by playing middle bottom. O can now snatch a draw from the jaws of defeat by playing centre or top right, leaving X to harp on about how the Wags should have been allowed to stay in the team hotel.

Despites its pedagogical pedigree, noughts and crosses quickly becomes futile when both players can easily force a draw. This was well-illustrated in WarGames, when the military supercomputer, equating the game to global thermonuclear war, evaluated all possible outcomes and remarked, “Strange game. The only winning move is not to play.” Failing that, just work hard and do your best.

8/10 An inspired choice of teaching material.

#9

Dr Lagina’s Math tutorial

√24/√3 = √(24/3) = √8

= √(4.2) = √4√2 = 2√2

√(81/25) = √81/√25 = 9/5

MOZ

Detention
Bramm S
Blake F
Morty
Hailey Y
Jordan A
Kara B

Mathematics – A-level standard.

These are some good examples of operations with surds, using the rules for both multiplication (ⁿ√(a.b) = ⁿ√a.ⁿ√b) and division (ⁿ√(a/b) = ⁿ√a/ⁿ√b). All the working is correct. The sloppy square root sign in the second example extending over the equals sign could be confusing, and handwriting in general isn’t great, but is legible.

Unfortunately, despite this good academic work, Dr Lagina is entirely unsuited to a career in education due to his surname. It would be no use trying to insist on a different pronunciation such as La-GHEE-na as students of any age will still make cruel remarks – it is little wonder that his detention list is so long. It is a shame that no careers officer ever tried to dissuade him from his current employment path, though he is still young enough to change his vocation. It is either that or change his name: even a teacher should be able to afford the £33 fee for a Deed Poll, though perhaps he has already changed it from something even more embarrassing, like Dr Lesticle, Dr Lyphilis or Nick Clegg.

There are a couple of other points to make. Firstly, a different hand has scrawled MOZ on the blackboard. According to Wilson and Kelling’s broken windows theory, a disordered environment signals a place where people do as they please and get away with it without being detected. Like the New York City Transit Authority removing graffiti from their trains leading to a sudden and significant drop in petty and serious crime, this should have been wiped off before the lesson began in a zero-tolerance approach. Not restoring a disordered environment early means that classroom discipline will only deteriorate, a fact surely worsened when one’s surname rhymes with a part of the female genitals. Whether Moz is the Morty who appears on the detention list, or just a deranged Morrissey fan is not clear.

Secondly, the appearance of Bramm S on the detention list raises the questions of how many students with this unusual name there are in this class that they need to be differentiated by their surnames, and whether this is a class consisting entirely of Gothic novelists, though there is no sign of Mary S or Edgar A P, and the works of Jordan A and Kara B must have been sadly lost to the world of literature.

8/10 – Good work, though loses a mark for ‘math’. And remember that sticks and stones may break your bones, but being called Dr Vagina every day of your working life will never hurt you. Though it may cause a career-ending nervous breakdown.

(Many thanks to Wim for sending this picture in.)

Break Time!

Just to say that there will be a short break from lessons whilst we at Blackboards in Porn Towers stop looking at pornography for long enough to move to bigger premises. In the meantime, please do browse the archives.

Thank you to everyone for your comments and for sending in so many great images of blackboards in porn. We have been deluged with a shedload* of pornography, but hope to get through the backlog and posting reports again soon. It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it.

(* The SI unit of pornography)

#8

Mary Had A Little Lamb

- ½ beat
- 1 beat
- 2 beats

Music – introductory level

The treble clefs have been beautifully drawn, but there is no hiding some fundamental errors on this blackboard.

Firstly, the time signature is written as both ‘4/4’ and ‘c’. This is tautologous as ‘c’ means common time (4/4), so just one of these will do. Also, there is no need to put the time signature on every line unless it has changed, and there are definitely no mixed meters in Mary Had a Little Lamb.

There is a good attempt at an explanation of the different lengths of notes, though there are actually no quavers in this particular piece, so the teacher might be introducing the concept too early. The dotted minim might not be necessary either, and it is unclear what the minim with a quaver flag is meant to be. The teacher should also draw a semibreve for the last note ('snow').

The biggest error, however, is that each stave has only four lines instead of five. This would make it very difficult for the students to know which notes to play. Reading from the bottom, the first notes would be B A G A | B B B, which sounds correct. But reading from the top, the notes would be D C B C | D D D, which sounds wrong as there is only a semitone between the second and third notes. Imagine if half the class were playing one version and the other half the other – it would sound terrible and the class’s confidence might be badly affected if they felt they couldn’t master even this simple melody. (To be honest, when teaching this level of music it inevitably sounds awful when played tutti, so the teacher really isn’t doing his ears any favours here.)

An experienced musician would see that the positioning of the treble clef tells us which line is G (hence its alternative name of the G-clef), but it is unlikely that students of this level would know that. After adding the missing line to the top of the stave, the tune itself is basically correct, though usually the last two notes of bar four go up (to D in this case). The fact that the last note is a G helps to indicate that this version is in the key of G so needs a # sign on the F line just after the treble clef.

A good mnemonic for remembering the notes on the treble clef is, reading from the bottom line, Every Good Boy Deserves Football. Or, perhaps in the case of this classroom, Flagellation.

5/10 A good effort, marred by a silly error.

(Many thanks to Lucy for sending this picture in.)

#7

1. S=0 A=0
2. S=1/4 A=1/16
3. S=1/2 A=1/4
4. S=1 A=1
5. S=2 A=4
6. S=3 A=9

Mathematics
t p
m
n
3/4 02/5
100=S=A
A
S 42/A9

Mathematics - year 8 level

This sets out to be a good illustration of the function more commonly expressed as y=x². (Why the teacher has chosen A and S is unclear; these are sometimes used in lower case form as acceleration and distance respectively, but the relationship between them would not then be physically correct.) The important points (S=0, S=1, two points where S<1 and two points where S>1) have been well chosen to illustrate this function, though it would have been useful to have included some more points where S<0 to show what happens when squaring a negative number.

The graph has then been plotted, but sadly this is where the lesson begins to falter. Firstly, axes on the graph should be labelled with 'S' (horizontal) and 'A' (vertical). And the graph that has actually been plotted seems to be more like:
1. S=0 A=4
2. S=4 A=8
3. S=6 A=15

The graph is roughly the correct shape, but is not positioned correctly: it clearly intersects with the vertical axis at A=4. Even allowing for other drawing errors, this is a function more like A=bS²+4. It would also have been useful to extend the graph to S<0.

What is going on on the right-hand blackboard is less clear. There is a drawing of a trapezium, and also the equation 100=S=A, which is hopefully not meant to be related to the function A=S².

Finally, the teacher should make sure that her students keep their focus on their work. She only has three students, so can't complain too much about the pupil-teacher ratio. The teacher is giving all her attention to the lone male student, allowing the two female students to talk to each other, thus reinforcing gender stereotypes of women in maths, despite being female herself. Sadly, it is this kind of attitude which leads to the 'Math class is tough' talking Barbie and low numbers of women choosing to study maths in further and higher education.

5/10 Shows some promise

(Many thanks to Chris for sending this picture in. Please keep them coming, folks.)

#6

H2N2O2(HO-N=N-OH)
+
H4SIO4(SI(OH)4)
H₂O + H₂OSO₄
H3PO3(HPO(OH2))
H₂SO₄ => SO₄
H₂OSO₄ = H

Chemistry – A-level/undergraduate level

This is a frustratingly inconsistent approach to writing chemical formulae. On the one hand the teacher has gone to the trouble of also using structural formulae to improve clarity (eg H₂N₂O₂ could be nitramide, but the addition of HO-N=N-OH makes it clear that we are dealing with hyponitrous acid here), but then writes SI (sulphur iodine) instead of Si (silicon) in the formula for orthosilicic acid. This, combined with not using subscripts for many of the numbers, could lead to a great deal of confusion.

Whilst this lesson appears to be aimed at quite a high level, such elementary errors may affect comprehension.

5/10 - rather sloppy.

#5

AFTER SCHOOL:

- math

1 + 1 = 2

1*

Mathematics - university/nursery school level.

This is clearly an extremely advanced level mathematical course, focusing on the Peano axioms for the natural numbers which formalised mathematics in the late 19th century. This course would culminate with Gödel's second incompleteness theorem which shows that the consitency of the Peano axioms cannot be formalised within Peano arithmetic itself.

Alternatively, it could be that the pupil, even at her advanced age, hasn't grasped that 1 + 1 = 2, and that all the after school one-to-one lessons in the world aren't going to work. Indeed, she probably won't even understand what 'one-to-one' means.

8/10 - loses two marks for 'math'.

#4

ENGLISH 101A

- NO EBOniCS
- NO SLAnG
- NO tArDineSS
- NO GUM
- NO tALKinG
- QUiZ EVERY FRiDAY
-

MS PriNCe

English - college level.

Ms Prince is setting her stall out early in this introductory course with a list of unacceptable behaviour in her class. Classroom discipline is extremely important to prevent disruption to other students, and also to encourage an individual work ethic. Few would argue with rules against tardiness, gum and talking. Regular assessment is also important for both teacher and pupil, but there are other ways of doing this than a weekly quiz.

"No slang" is a more controversial statement for an English teacher. Language, especially English, is a living, breathing thing. Where would classics from Ullyses to Trainspotting be without their coined words and vernacular language? Of course formal English is important, but even, some would say especially, an introductory English course should look at the differences between types of English and their appropriate uses.

"No ebonics" is an even more controversial statement for what is presumably an ethnically diverse cohort. Ever since Brown v Board of Education declared separate public schools for black and white children unconstitutional in 1954, educators have been divided over the use of African American Vernacular English. Some see it as socially limiting and to be eliminated, whilst others recognise it as a language in its own right, to be incorporated into the teaching of black children. Poe, Melville and Twain have all used AAVE - handled correctly it could be a very interesting and inclusive project to study its use.

Handwriting could be much improved, especially for an English teacher. There seems to be a bizarre mixture of upper and lower case. Of course, great artists break the rules, and non-standard capitalisation can be used to great effect, but on an introductory course perhaps this is one rule that shouldn't be broken.

6/10 - more detail needed.

#3

2x + 3 = 9

x = /2 [or 12?]

Mathematics - simple algebra.

The handwriting is large and generally clear, even though this class appears to only have one student in it, and he sits at the very front. It might be worth advising the student to have his eyes tested if he is unable to read smaller text at this distance. Remember that poor learning may be as a result of poor vision - the student might not even be aware that he has a problem. If the teacher does keep her handwriting that size she will have to get a bigger whiteboard when she starts doing quadratic equations. Finally, when writing algebraic equations, it is preferable to do a more cursive x for the unknown symbol, to avoid confusion with a multiplication sign.

Unfortunately, the answer is unclearly written - is it 2? 12? 1/2? Whichever of these it is meant to be, it is wrong. Here is the correct calculation:

2x + 3 = 9

Subtract 3 from both sides:
2x = 6

Divide both sides by 2:
x = 3

Given the differences in handwriting in the '2's though, it is possible that the teacher left the answer blank for the student to fill in, and is pointing for him to return to his desk. Either way, it is better to show one's working, so that if an error is made, but followed by correct calculations, the examiner may still give marks for the later parts of the answer, even if incorrect.

5/10 - could do better.

#2

ARCTIC CIRCLE
BALTIC STATES
ST PETERSBURG
MOSCOW
CENTRAL RUSSIA
UKRAINE
EUROPE
TURKISH STATES
BREAKAWAY REPUBLICS
SIBERIA
(illegible)
VLADIVOSTOK
ASIAN STEPPES

PROF. STEFANO
ROOM 32C

OFFICE HRS
M 2PM-4PM
T-W 12-1.30PM
T 9AM-10.30AM
F 5PM-7PM
SAT-SUN OFF

IMPERIAL RUSSIA 3271
1609-1752

MAIN STUDY QUESTION -
AS TIME PASSES, THE RUSSIAN IDEAL OF
GOVERNMENT UNDERWENT A RADICAL SHIFT
DESCRIBE THAT SHIFT & ALL ASPECTS
OF IT

History - A-level standard or higher. Two blackboards shows that a lot of work has gone into this lesson.

Not a bad map by history teacher standards, though St Petersburg is too far south and Vladivostok too far north. But it certainly gives an idea of the key areas - this was a time of great Russian expansion into the Baltic, Ukraine and Siberia, war with the Ottoman Empire, and the moving of the capital to St Petersburg. The lumping together of 'breakaway republics' may show a tendency to generalise.

The title Imperial Russia 1609-1752 is something of a misnomer. The Russian Empire wasn't founded until 1721 - before that date it was the Tsardom of Russia. In fact, the date range chosen for module 3271 does seem somewhat arbitrary.

The main study question is rather awkwardly posed, using a mixture of tenses, but is open enough to stretch the more able students.

Handwriting is rather sloppy - all caps, sometimes at a rather wild angle, and with one map label illegible. The student pictured has been lucky to find Professor Stefano in, as his office hours are somewhat idiosyncratic. But this could be a result of education cutbacks, or flexitime due to his personal circumstances, so will not affect the overall score. (In fact, his work-life balance may be under threat as he feels the need to specify that he does not work at weekends.)

Overall: a very good effort - 7/10.

#1

Compound Angle Formulae

sin (A + B)
= sin A cos B + cos A sin B

cos (A + B)
= cos A cos B - sin A sin B

tan (A + B)
= tan A + tan B
1 - Tan A Tan B

A-level standard trigonometry. Maths all correct. Good pluralisation of 'formulae'. Neat handwriting. Loses a mark for 'Tan' instead of 'tan'. But otherwise: excellent work!
9/10